In Tenerife, where Britons come to feel at home, talks about artist impersonators, ex-pats who own and have named the various pubs and that “The ghosts of old television shows haunt the casual observer. It’s as if Only Fools and Horses and Rising Damp never came off the air.”

You can understand how it comes about, when time stood still for most expats who have been here for years. Precious few learn Spanish or take on any new culture. Partly, because running their “dream” British bar does not afford them time, opportunity or motivation to do so.

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